This place is peopled
by the foolish men of whom we have heard, who built their houses on the
sand. The chief amusement of visitors is thus: you put on some old
clothes, which have evidently just retired from the coal-heaving
business, stand in the water up to your ankles, and grasp manfully, with
both hands, a rope; then a watery creature, named Surf, climbs upon you
and gets down on the other side; you rush to a neighboring shanty, put
on your store clothes, and feel twice as warm as you would have felt if
you hadn't wrestled with Surf. The reports from Boston are that the
Pilgrim Fathers have ceased to enjoy their coffins and shrouds, since
Jubilee JIM has commenced to carry pleasure-seekers to the seaside on
Plymouth Rock.
Saratoga is still the place for SARA to patronize. The chief objection
to that place is that the water is so muddy that they call it Congress
Water. However, you soon become infatuated with it. I once saw a very
stout lady imbibe sixteen glasses of the water, and as I left the scene
of dissipation she was screaming for more. I concluded that she was a
sister-in-law to BOREAS. A young and tender Sixteenth Amendment, who was
a three-quarter orphan, (she had only a step-father,) has been known to
drink, unaided, thirty glasses of Saratoga water in twenty-four hours.
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