lived; however upon an honorable
footing, for it cannot be understood I mean otherwise. I first began
to interest myself for Madam du Deffand, whom the loss of her eyes
made an object of commiseration in mine; but her manner of living,
so contrary to my own, that her hour of going to bed was almost mine
for rising; her unbounded passion for low wit, the importance she gave
to every kind of printed trash, either complimentary or abusive, the
despotism and transports of her oracles, her excessive admiration or
dislike of everything, which did not permit her to speak upon any
subject without convulsions, her inconceivable prejudices,
invincible obstinacy, and the enthusiasm of folly to which this
carried her in her passionate judgments; all disgusted me and
diminished the attention I wished to pay her. I neglected her and
she perceived it; this was enough to set her in a rage, and,
although I was sufficiently aware how much a woman of her character
was to be feared, I preferred exposing myself to the scourge of her
hatred rather than to that of her friendship.
My having so few friends in the society of Madam de Luxembourg would
not have been in the least dangerous had I had no enemies in her
family. Of these I had but one, who, in my then situation, was as
powerful as a hundred. It certainly was not M. de Villeroy, her
brother; for he not only came to see me, but had several times invited
me to Villeroy; and as I had answered to the invitation with all
possible politeness and respect, he had taken my vague manner of doing
it as a consent, and arranged with Madam de Luxembourg a journey of
a fortnight, in which it was proposed to me to make one of the
party.
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