I knew I was described to the public very different from what
I really was, and so opposite, that notwithstanding my faults, all
of which I was determined to relate, I could not but be a gainer by
showing myself in my proper colors. This, besides, not being to be
done without setting forth others also in theirs, and the work for the
same reason not being of a nature to appear during my lifetime, and
that of several other persons, I was the more encouraged to make my
confession, at which I should never have to blush before any person. I
therefore resolved to dedicate my leisure to the execution of this
undertaking, and immediately began to collect such letters and
papers as might guide or assist my memory, greatly regretting the loss
of all I had burned, mislaid and destroyed.
The project of absolute retirement, one of the most reasonable I had
ever formed, was strongly impressed upon my mind, and for the
execution of it I was already taking measures, when Heaven, which
prepared me a different destiny, plunged me into another vortex.
Montmorency, the ancient and fine patrimony of the illustrious
family of that name, was taken from it by confiscation. It passed by
the sister of Duc Henri, to the house of Conde, which has changed
the name of Montmorency to that of Enghien, and the duchy has no other
castle than an old tower, where the archives are kept, and to which
the vassals come to do homage. But at Montmorency, or Enghien, there
is a private house, built by Crosat, called le pauvre, which having
the magnificence of the most superb chateaux, deserves and bears the
name of a castle.
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