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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"Misalliance"

I didnt think I'd be alive.
MRS TARLETON. Oh, what a thing to say! You mustnt talk like that.
JOHNNY. Hes out of his mind. He thinks it's past dinner-time.
MRS TARLETON. Oh, youve no sense, Johnny. He calls his lunch his
dinner, and has his tea at half-past six. Havnt you, dear?
GUNNER. _[timidly]_ Hasnt everybody?
JOHNNY. _[laughing]_ Well, by George, thats not bad.
MRS TARLETON. Now dont be rude, Johnny: you know I dont like it.
_[To Gunner]_ A cup of tea will pick you up.
GUNNER. I'd rather not. I'm all right.
TARLETON. _[going to the sideboard]_ Here! try a mouthful of sloe
gin.
GUNNER. No, thanks. I'm a teetotaler. I cant touch alcohol in any
form.
TARLETON. Nonsense! This isnt alcohol. Sloe gin. Vegetarian, you
know.
GUNNER. _[hesitating]_ Is it a fruit beverage?
TARLETON. Of course it is. Fruit beverage. Here you are. _[He
gives him a glass of sloe gin]._
GUNNER. _[going to the sideboard]_ Thanks. _[he begins to drink it
confidently; but the first mouthful startles and almost chokes him]._
It's rather hot.
TARLETON. Do you good. Dont be afraid of it.
MRS TARLETON. _[going to him]_ Sip it, dear. Dont be in a hurry.
_Gunner sips slowly, each sip making his eyes water._
JOHNNY. _[coming forward into the place left vacant by Gunner's visit
to the sideboard]_ Well, now that the gentleman has been attended to,
I should like to know where we are.


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