Now the Great Woodcock Saga is brought about in this way:--First
of all suppose that a woodcock has shown himself somewhere or other
during the morning. If he was seen it follows, as the day follows
the night, (1), that _everybody_ shot at him at the most fantastic
distances without regard to the lives and limbs of the rest of the
party; (2), that (in most cases) everybody missed him; (3), that
everybody, though having, according to his own version, been
especially careful himself, has been placed in imminent peril by the
recklessness of the rest; (4), that everybody threw himself flat on
his face to avoid death; and (5), that the woodcock is not really a
bird at all, but a devil. The following is suggested as an example of
Woodcock-dialogue, the scene being laid at lunch:--
[Illustration]
_First Sportsman_ (_pausing in his attack on a plateful of curried
rabbit_). By Jupiter! that was a smartish woodcock. I never saw the
beggar till he all but flew into my face, and then away he went, like
a streak of greased lightning. I let him have both barrels; but I
might as well have shot at a gnat. Still, I fancy I tickled him up
with my left.
_Second Sportsman_ (_a stout, jovial man, breaking in_). Tickled _him_
up! By gum, I thought _I_ was going to be tickled up, I tell you.
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