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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 159, September 29th, 1920"


"Man's original evolution from the anthropoid apes ... becomes a
reasonable hypothesis, especially when we think of the semi-naked
savages who inhabited these islands when Julius Caesar landed on our
shores, and our present Prime Minister."--_Church Family Newspaper._
* * * * *
"The contemplated aerial expedition to the South Pole will start in
October. Aeroplanes and airships will be used, and the object of the
trip is to study magnetic wages."--_Irish Paper._
Incidentally it is expected a new altitude record may be achieved.
* * * * *
[Illustration: TARTARIN DANS LES INDES.
BOTH (_together_). "TIENS! LE TIGRE!"
[M. CLEMENCEAU has just sailed for India after big game.]]
* * * * *
[Illustration: _The Wife (peeved at husband going off to football match on
the anniversary of their wedding-day_). "'AVE YOU FORGOTTEN WHAT 'APPENED
THIS DAY SEVEN YEARS AGO?"
_The Husband_. "FORGOTTEN? NOT LIKELY, OLD GIRL. WHY, THAT WAS THE DAY
BOLTON ROVERS BEAT ASTON UNITED FIVE--NOTHING."]
* * * * *
NEW RHYMES FOR OLD CHILDREN.
THE SNAIL.
The life of the snail is a fight against odds,
Though fought without fever or flummox;
You see, he is one of those gasteropods
Which have to proceed on their stomachs.


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