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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, January 29, 1919"

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* * * * *
A FINE EAR FOR THE HASPIRATE.
"I wish 'as 'ow I warn't married."
Mr. Punt crooned out the impious aspiration as he sorted a judicious
modicum of hemp into the canary seed. He spoke in semi-soliloquy,
yet quite loud enough to reach the vigilant ear of Mrs. Punt, who was
dusting the cages at the other end of the live-stock store. She said
nothing in reply, but her eye fixed itself upon him with a glint
eloquent of what she might say later.
"Why is that, Mr. Punt?" I asked encouragingly.
"Why, it's on'y to-day, Sir, as I met a lidy, a widder lidy, friend o'
Uncle George's down Putney way, as 'as one leg, a nice little bit o'
'ouse property and two great hauk's eggs."
It did seem a rare combination of marriageable qualities. I asked the
value of a great auk's egg, and was surprised to learn that a specimen
had recently been sold at auction for something like three hundred
pounds. I inquired whether all the great auks' eggs that came on the
market were genuine, or whether "faked" specimens were to be met with.
I had heard, I thought, of "faked" eagles' eggs.


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